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No longer 49. Still not dead.
Jan. 15th, 2025 06:50 pm So.... ten days until I turn 50.
Of course, using a decimal-based number system as we do, any multiple of 10 would seem a milestone. Even so, this year is ... so much further than I thought I would live. I didn't know about my congenital heart condition, of course -- not prior to 2018 or so. But I always had a sense, in my teens and twenties, that there was something... off about my genome. I wondered if others could sense it.
There were, of course, a lot of ideas floating around in the 1990s and 2000s (that would metastasize online in the late 2010s), based in part on misreadings of genetics. Looking at some of them (which every so often get suggested to me by the Tube of You), I can only wonder as to what providence kept me from dwelling too long on such theories. I suppose, in the end, I simply decided that whether I was scrap or not, I would live as well as I could, regain some of the ground I had lost in the Truncated Year of Hell, and not worry about any metric other than "How am I doing?"
I've been told my cousins are currently confused by my attitude on this point, why I'm in my line of work, and other things. But where were they back then? Not to come off as accusatory, but honestly....
Anyway. I have spent a year in, if not exactly seclusion, then laying low everywhere but the Allspark Board. And while the Book of Faces is basically just something to keep for messenger functions at this point, I do need to stretch out, as much as work-life balance will allow. If nothing else, the world is not going to go away, and I have to find a safe-and-sane way of dealing with it.
I have -- peaceably -- crossed off half of the few entries in my Book of Grudges. The last two will prove more troublesome, but one is already giving me weregild, though they do not know it. 😉
More important, though, will be my health (physical, social, and financial), and making sure that those I care about remain okay.
We'll see how that all goes.
Of course, using a decimal-based number system as we do, any multiple of 10 would seem a milestone. Even so, this year is ... so much further than I thought I would live. I didn't know about my congenital heart condition, of course -- not prior to 2018 or so. But I always had a sense, in my teens and twenties, that there was something... off about my genome. I wondered if others could sense it.
There were, of course, a lot of ideas floating around in the 1990s and 2000s (that would metastasize online in the late 2010s), based in part on misreadings of genetics. Looking at some of them (which every so often get suggested to me by the Tube of You), I can only wonder as to what providence kept me from dwelling too long on such theories. I suppose, in the end, I simply decided that whether I was scrap or not, I would live as well as I could, regain some of the ground I had lost in the Truncated Year of Hell, and not worry about any metric other than "How am I doing?"
I've been told my cousins are currently confused by my attitude on this point, why I'm in my line of work, and other things. But where were they back then? Not to come off as accusatory, but honestly....
Anyway. I have spent a year in, if not exactly seclusion, then laying low everywhere but the Allspark Board. And while the Book of Faces is basically just something to keep for messenger functions at this point, I do need to stretch out, as much as work-life balance will allow. If nothing else, the world is not going to go away, and I have to find a safe-and-sane way of dealing with it.
I have -- peaceably -- crossed off half of the few entries in my Book of Grudges. The last two will prove more troublesome, but one is already giving me weregild, though they do not know it. 😉
More important, though, will be my health (physical, social, and financial), and making sure that those I care about remain okay.
We'll see how that all goes.
